Ignorance is Bliss?

I've gotten four more Installations down and only three to go as the end of November comes into view. But of course, there's more to do in November than just Installations. I am getting ready for the start of our Transitionals the first weekend in December and I am getting a budget together for the last two years of this journey, the two that I will share with my player to be named later, also known for now as Mr. Wizard. Did you ever have an idea that sounded great when you started out, but once you got into it, you weren't really sure it was such a cool thing? Well I had this silly idea that, in the interests of full disclosure, I would write this two year budget for all the expenses that I and my man would have in our two years together, to give myself an idea of how expensive it was going to get, since the costs seem to go up every year, and so that he, and his wife or escort, could know what to expect. I sort of figured that it is better to get all the big shocks done up front because after that, most people can take anything in stride. But now that I sort of have the whole thing done, the numbers on it look kind of big and I wonder if anyone is going to say yes after seeing this thing. Even after taking off the stipend amounts that are available the last two years and even after splitting the joint costs more onto my side than his side, the numbers are sort of owwie. Maybe it wouldn't be so disturbing if a person went in not knowing and just sort of spent as they went. Then it would only be a shock when it was over and they looked back on how much was spent. The biggest items appear to be travel expenses and, believe it or not, gifts. If I've done my math correctly, then my travel expenses for those last two years are going to come out around $1,400 a month, on average, for twenty-four months. Assuming he drives instead of flying, his total comes in a fair bit lower, but it's still over $1,100 a month and that's just for gas and hotels. No food, no nothing else. Wow! I couldn't believe the total on the gifts either. For the two of us together, counting everything I could think of that we have to pay for, the gift budget for the two years (really almost all of it is in the last year) came to $16,700. AAAHHH!!! After those numbers, my $6,000 budget for clothes for the two years looked almost miniscule. And $1200 for postage, unless I can get more of my girls onto e-mail, practically nothing. After all, when you are drowning in an ocean, who cares if someone pours a tea cup of water on your head. All in and all done, after all the reimbursements and fund raisers I could think of and assuming contributions from our respective Chapters for a joint reception and assuming that I took on the lion's share of the gifts and other shared expenses, the lowest I could get his number per month for twenty-four months was about $1,200. Of course if I ask him by February or March and he starts saving early, he can think of the amount as around $950 per month. Hey, that's a three digit number. No problem, right? So now I wonder. Is ignorance bliss or is full disclosure better? I need someone to say yes after all and the idea of the job alone is enough to scare anyone. On the other hand, if he's the type to get scared off, then he's probably not right for me, since I am definitely more of a roller coaster girl than a merry-go-round type. I'll take the big drops and lows if I get the big highs too. Next weekend I will finish off the last of the Installations in my local area.